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Gov. J.B. Pritzker signs new bill to tax the air we breathe

Gov. J.B. Pritzker signed into law a measure that will force all Illinoisians to pay a tax for breathing oxygen that belongs to the State of Illinois. This a new funding stream the governor is counting on to ease the state’s deep budget woes. 

"I already signed a bill that will allow the people of Illinois to smoke pot. The people buying this product will be taxed, however, they will be exhaling free pot for others who didn't pay the original tax. Illinois air will now have a large amount of cannabis in it. There will be so many free loaders getting their fix for free. Just know, if you come to Illinois, you will have to pay, one way or another!!" stated the very delusional Governor. 

The Governor stated that this is just the beginning. He went on to inform LNN that he is going to propose a bill to outlaw independent news networks that do not agree with his agendas. 

For the followers of LNN, do not worry, we will break any law put into motion that tries to ban us from telling the truth.